Dealing with loss is one of life’s hardest moments. In some cases, it may be even more difficult to watch a loved one cope with losing someone. As much as we want to hold their hand through such a tumultuous time, we should be aware that everyone copes with loss in their own way.
While some may prefer the company of others at all times, others may push you away to take time to mourn on their own. At times, there may not be a way to gauge at what stage of the grieving process your close one may be in, making it harder to show them love and support.
If you’re wanting to be more delicate about how you approach your loved ones, here are a few ideas to shower them with love while giving them space to cope.
Pregnancy loss
There’s a stigma when it comes to miscarriage and that is the need to say positive things such as, “You can try again” or “At least you know you can get pregnant”. These types of statements aren’t only hurtful, they end up creating more damage and resentment toward the person saying it.
After experiencing a miscarriage the last thing you want to hear are those types of statements even if it was meant to come off in the most positive, supportive way. If you really want to show support, acknowledge their loss just like you would any other.
As a parent, losing a child is the most devastating thing that can happen no matter how old their child is. If you don’t know what to say, send a gift that will say it for you.
They say a picture says a thousand words and so can gifts. Miscarriage gifts at laurelbox are specially made for pregnancy loss.
Each gift box comes with handpicked items that will say what you can’t while making them feel valid, acknowledged, and loved.
Since miscarriage is hard to talk about, they may not want to open up about it but at least they will feel your heart is with them when they receive a care package such as one of these gift boxes.
Spouse loss
The loss of a spouse is heartbreaking. After all, no matter how long the couple has been together they shared the most intimate moments and feelings. For those that believe in soul mates, this loss is life-shattering since a spouse is a best friend, the love of life, a confidant, and somebody’s everything.
They say time heals, however, when it comes to a spouse it is said that time will only make the coping easier but never the loss.
If your loved one has experienced the loss of a spouse, try to be there for them as much as you can by doing simple things such as running errands for them, helping them take care of any home maintenance to-dos. Offer to cook or bring a meal over to share together.
If the couple has young kids, offer to take the kids to do something fun for a few hours so that the parent can have some time to themselves to cope in ways they can’t in front of their kids.
Loss of a parent
The loss of a parent is never easy. Even if it’s from natural causes or old age, this is the only person you have known all of your life.
The person who cared for you from birth, the person who loved you wholeheartedly and unconditionally, the one person you can run to with all of your troubles, and they will always be there to comfort you. For that person to all of a sudden not be there is a tough pill to swallow.
Life will no longer be the same without mom’s advice over the phone or dad’s laugh during holiday celebrations. The best way to be there for your loved ones is to put yourself in their position.
How would you feel after losing a parent? What would you need the most? Is it talking about all of the good memorial ideas you had? Going through pictures and seeing all of the memories you created with your parent?
To help your loved one cope with the loss of a parent, ask them what you can do for them. It may be something as simple as spending time together so that they can talk about their mom or their dad or a simple shoulder to cry on.
When trying to be supportive, be mindful of not being overbearing. At times when people say that they don’t need anything, they may really mean it.
In those cases, send flowers, a meal, a care package, or any small gesture to let them know they are loved. In other cases, your loved one may say they don’t need anything and not mean it. It doesn’t hurt to check periodically, especially with a simple text in today’s digital world.
